Sword Art Online #15: The Real World You Never Saw

“What a nightmare! I dreamt I was stuck in a crappy anime series. What if it isn’t a dream…?”

Dammit, Kazuto. You just had to cut your hair, didn’t you…?

So we’re finally out of Sword Art Online. Think it’ll get any better? Think again…

It’s been two months since the SAO incident. Kazuto is in the process of readjusting to the real world after fighting two years of video game addiction. Also, we meet her younger sister/cousin Suguha, who practices kendo.

You better be careful, Suguha. All that rehab has given Kazuto the ever-so powerful ability to crush plastic water bottles. Pretty soon, he’ll be strong enough to snap twigs off of tree branches.

They do a sparring match and it turns out that Kazuto’s experiences in SAO has made him better at kendo.

Single still-frame action: They exist not just in SAO, but IRL too.

Unfortuantely, swordfighting experience gained from playing video games nonstop for two years can’t help him against actual kendo training.

Later that day, Kazuto pays a visit to Asuna in the hospital she is in. Around three hundred players, Asuna included, have yet to awaken. Also, Kayaba is missing, supposedly evading the law. Asuna’s father, Souzou and a colleague of his named Nobuyuki Sugou also visit. Anyway, Sugou seems to want to make something official between him and Asuna.

I don’t know, Sugou. I heard muscular atrophy causes someone’s looks to deteriorate as well. Since it’s Asuna we’re talking about, no one would bother to know the difference.

It turns out that the ‘something official’ they were discussing is marriage. Sugou is actually Asuna’s real-life fiance. Also, he comes off less as a fiancee and more like a creepy, slimy bastard what with the way he keeps touching Asuna while she’s in a coma.

“Wanna know the best thing about unconscious chicks? They can’t say no.”

…I think it’s time for a Sonic Sez.

Anyway, Sugou explains that Argus, the company that developed SAO, went bankrupt thanks to costs of development and damages. Meaning Kayaba’s not only responsible for murders of around 4,000, but that same amount of people probably lost their jobs too. Also, SAO server maintenance were transferred to another company which Asuna’s father is the CEO of and where Sugou works at. In other words, he’s basically keeping Asuna alive.

Let’s see: Badtouching his comatose fiancee right in front of Kazuto, inviting Kazuto to their wedding just so he can laugh at him some more. This world is apparently full of…

Sugou then forbids Kazuto further contact with the Yuuki family, at least until their wedding in the next week where he can rub it in his face even more. Later that night, Kazuto secludes himself in his room, running the risk of hypothermia, reduced to a sobbing wreck over losing his in-game wife. I hope he doesn’t do this on a basis; Haruyuki’s constant whining annoyed me.

In a brief flashback, we learn that Kazuto is actually the son of Suguha’s aunt. We also learn that he built his own computer when he was six years old. What, did he learn quantum physics when he was eight years old too?

Anyway, the episode concludes with Kazuto receiving an email from Egil that next morning, which shows an image of Asuna, stuck inside another video game!

Sorry, Kazuto, but your princess is in another castle.

So according to the next season PV, Kazuto is gonna jump into yet another video game. I’ll be honest: I’m not looking forward to it. At all. I already hate this show enough, but I’m only gonna hate it more. Just you all wait…